


Two Slow Dancers

by Ohgabiz



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji Needs a Hug, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Bittersweet, Bokuto Koutarou Being Bokuto Koutarou, Editor Akaashi Keiji, Inspired by Music, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Canon, Pro Volleyball Player Bokuto Koutarou, School Reunion, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:36:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29859591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ohgabiz/pseuds/Ohgabiz
Summary: Akaashi Keiji hated change.He knew it was inevitable, that it was just how life was and that he had no control over it. But still, if he could, he would keep things the same.Akaashi is invited to a 10 year high school reunion  of a class he is not even part of and has to face the fact that sometimes are just not meant to stay the same.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou (mentioned)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Two Slow Dancers

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [Two Slow Dancers by Mitski.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUfkfJfsKrc&ab_channel=DeadOceans)

Akaashi Keiji hated change.  
He knew it was inevitable, that it was just how life was and that he had no control over it. But still, if he could, he would keep things the same. 

_He is happy now_ , he tells himself that every morning in the mirror, _you're happy now_. And it's not like he had been unhappy before, he hasn’t and that kind of is the problem.  
He was happy before, then he wasn’t but he is happy now. 

Before, he thinks, he liked the way things were before.

The invitation is still sitting on his countertop, on his too small, too far away from home apartment. He knows what's written inside; he had waited for it to come. Konoha had mentioned it, only in passing but Akaashi was sure it was his way to ease the idea to him. He wasn’t even sure why he got the invitation.

The last time he received such a well done invitation was when Kuroo and Kenma got married. He wanted to go, he did, but he just couldn’t. Kenma said it was ok, that he understood. Akaashi doubted it, he was marrying his one true love after all. 

And Akaashi …  
Akaashi was dreading change like it was something he could run away from.  
He couldn’t. 

But this, this he could. It would be so easy to just hide inside his apartment like he did at his friend’s wedding, he wouldn’t even have to answer. All he had to do is not go. 

And yet… the invitation is still open on his counter, the gold letters shining everytime he moves it. He doesn’t get why he received it, It wasn't even his class. It wasn't like he was still on the team. It wasn’t like there was still a team for him to be part of.

He swears that every time he looks at that goddamn piece of paper he hears a laugh mocking him, a laugh he knows too well, one that could never mock him, not on purpose, never meaning any harm.  
He doesn’t know how long it has been since the last time he heard that laugh,doesn’t know how much it has changed, how much he has changed. 

He picks up his phone, the last person he texted was his mom, four hours ago, she still hadn’t replied. He scrolled down a little bit more.  
The pic was dark, he could barely see the person behind it, they were wearing their old jerseys. (Their old new jerseys, the ones they weren’t so sure they even wanted to use but still did because that change was going to be good, that change was going to make them happy.)

**To Kenma**  
_Hey, do you know where I can rent a suit?_

Akaashi hates change so he is glad that the school court still looks the same.  
There are some balloons and posters covering the walls but you can still see the outlines on the floor, can still see the basketball hoop, can still see exactly where the volleyball net used to be.

It looks more similar than different, it's like Akaashi had entered a time machine. He is 17 again, it’s prom night (not his), he is wearing a suit kenma helped him pick, it’s a little bit too big, he is sweating and he doesn’t know what to do with his hands. 

It's been 10 years and he still doesn’t know where to put his hands.

The poster written with big gold letters mock him. Fukurodani’s class of ‘12 10 year reunion.  
It’s not even his class’ reunion, what will he do next year? Probably skip, it’s not like any of his classmates will notice. 

“I can’t believe you actually came.” 

Konoha is wearing a black shirt tucked inside tight looking black jeans. and Akaashi came in a goddamn suit. It’s definitely prom all over again. 

“I was invited.” 

Konoha throws his arm around him, his hand reaching to touch the ends of Akaashi’s hair. Maybe he should have cut it.

“You’re letting it grow.”  
“And you cut your bangs.”  
Konoha laughs, he pushes himself away from Akaashi, not in a rude way, he is just making what he knows he is going to be comfortable with.  
“You look good, older.”  
“It’s been 10 years, I would be sad if I still looked like a 17 year old.”

It’s been 10 years. 

It almost makes him choke. 

“How’s work? We haven’t heard much from you.”  
“Good. Tenma is a good boss, if i could call him that.” He feels awkward, this whole situation makes him want to run away, maybe he should, it would be easy, just walk away. Konoha wouldn’t stop him.  
“The little giant, right? Kuroo told us a little about it.”

Akaashi feels his breath get stuck on his throat. How does Konoha know? Why did Kuroo tell him? How does he even have contact with Kuroo?

“We meet, sometimes, after games. He even gets us good seats when he can. He is nice when he is not being a pain in the ass with his blocks.” 

We meet sometimes. 

After games. 

_Oh._

“Kuroo-san is very nice, yes.” 

He is sweating.  
Why did he wear this tie?  
Why did he come?

“Keiji.” 

why did he even get that stupid invitation.  
He is not even having fun.  
Maybe he should say sorry to Konoha and leave.

“Akaashi!” 

That is definitely not Konoha’s voice. 

Akaashi Keiji hates change. 

The man in front of him is tall, muscular even though he is wearing a baggy jacket over his t’shirt (Akaashi really shouldn’t’ have rented that goddam suit), his jeans have a little hole in the front pocket, his hair is shorter than Akaashi remembers but still spiked up. 

But his eyes.  
His eyes are the same as they had been on prom night, as they had been when Akaashi was 17, as they had been the first he saw him, a star among the other players. 

Bokuto Koutaro had changed, but if Akaashi tried hard enough he still looked the same. 

(He wonders if he will dream of this version of him at night.)

“Bokuto-san.” 

Akaashi is going to kill Konoha as soon as he comes out of the bathroom. 

Bokuto is standing up beside him, telling how MSBY had won their last game, his arms move around a lot, sometimes bumping on Akaashi, he shivers every time.

Komi and Sakurui had joined them not long after Bokuto arrived. Yukie was talking to some old classmates but she had hugged him as soon as she saw him, petted his cheeks and complimented his hair.  
She told him she missed him and he said he did too.  
He wasn’t lying but the words still felt wrong coming out of his mouth.

“Its a pity Washio couldn’t be here.” Bokuto says. Akaashi looks at him, waits for his hair to drop, he is ready to say all the words he knows will make Bokuto feel better again. It never comes. “But I got it, I almost didn't come.”

Akaashi looks at him. Really look at him.  
He knows what he is looking for, he is analyzing, reading between the lines to see if this man is the Bokuto he knows. He is, but he is different. 

Akaashi Keiji hates change.  
And all Bokuto Koutaro did was change.

He doesn’t know what Bokuto is saying, what story he is telling now, he just watches his mouth move.  
He wonders what his kiss would feel like, if his lips will taste of chapstick, if he kept his eyes open the imagine of kissing Bokuto would be the only thing his mind would conjure. 

If things had kept the same, he might have known. 

He doesn't know when Bokuto stops talking but now all eyes are on him. Komi and Sakurui are staring at him with knowing eyes.  
“Well, I’m going to check if Konoha didn’t hit his head on the sink because no one normal takes that long to go to the bathroom.” Komi says, he jabs Sakurui on the ribs with his elbow before leaving.  
“Oh yes, I think I saw someone I know, I will go check. See you guys later.”

After Akaashi kills Konoha, he is going to go after those two. 

Bokuto says his goodbyes and Akaashi thinks he is going to leave too. Maybe it would be good. To see Bokuto’s back retreating. He wonders, and wonders, and wonders what it would be like to run his hands over it, to feel the muscle beneath that shirt. 

“Hey Akaashi.” 

Akaashi raises his head to look at him, his hands are fidgeting behind his back, his glasses are falling from his face, he doesn’t push them back up, he doesn't have to because Bokuto does it for him.  
They are not very close, they had been closer before (before what, he thinks, before as in high school? Before they graduated… before there was never such a thing as too much space between them.) but it still made Akaashi’s cheeks turn red.  
Bokuto is looking at him, not smiling but Akaashi knows he is content. His eyes shine a light Akaashi thought he was never going to see before. He is glad he did. 

“Hey, Akaashi.” Bokuto says, his fingers are not touching his face anymore, but they still linger as if he did. “You’ve changed.”

Akaashi changed? No, he got it all wrong. Akaashi was still his 17 year old self, just in a 27 year old body. He is still scared of authority, of failure. He is scared of being alone in his apartment but still won’t call anyone for help. He still has feelings he doesn’t understand for his best friend (is Bokuto really his best friend when they haven't talked in years?).

"It 's good.” 

Akaashi doesn’t know how much longer they stay playing this game of just staring at each other without saying a word or when the up beat song changes to a slower one.  
He doesn’t know the lyrics but he knows he has heard it before.

“Do you want to dance?” Bokuto asks, he doesn’t look so sure, looks a little bit scared too. Funny, Akaashi thinks, old Bokuto would have pulled him to the dance floor without asking for permission, old Akaashi would have protested but would have gone anyway.  
They had done that before, in this very same gym, in this very same school. 

Is this what time apart does to people? 

“hm?”  
“Do you want to dance? You know, for old times sake.” 

Akaashi thinks about it. All he does is think about it.  
At night when he is almost falling asleep, all he can think about is Bokuto's smile.  
Everytime Tenma has trouble with characterization, he always describes a very specific pair of eyes.  
Everytime he comes home, he wonders what it would be like to come home to him. 

Akaashi wonders and wonders and wonders. 

_Maybe you should do something about it._ Kenma had said once, on the rare occasions they actually see each other. _Maybe you are just too scared to face him.  
_  
“For old times sake.” 

He takes Bokuto’s hand.

Akaashi Keiji hates change.  
So he is delighted to see that Bokuto is still a terrible,terrible dancer.  
“I’m sorry.” The bigger boy, the man, says for the fifth time that night after stepping on Akaashi’s feet again.  
"It 's ok.” 

They are doing the whole awkward dancing thing. Their bodies are barely touching but their hands are interlocked (Akaashi’s are still bigger but Bokuto’s have new calluses that he didn't have before.) They dance like two kids who were forced by their parents to interact.

There are other people dancing around them, he thinks he saw Konoha and Yukie dancing but he is not sure. The gym is big enough that no one is bumping into each other. 

“I never thought I was going to say this but … I kind of miss High school.” Bokuto confesses and akaashi heart stops beating for a second.  
“Yeah, me too.”  
“I miss playing with you guys. And going to training camps against _KurooandKenma_.” He says it so fast that Akaashi almost misunderstands it. Bokuto is right. They are KurooandKenma. Always together.  
How lucky can someone be to spend their whole lifes with their one true love?  
Akaashi wouldn’t know.

The music changes, he kind of hopes for it to be an upbeat song again so they can let go of each other and go back to awkwardly talking to each other on one of the tables. Akaashi is not that lucky.  
Instead it starts to play a song that is even slower. 

_“Does it smell like a school gymnasium in here?”_

“Oh wow. That seems very appropriate” Bokuto says, he let’s go of Akaashis hands and he thinks that this is it, Bokuto is finally done entertaining him and this has finally become too weird for him. Again, Akaashi is not that lucky, and life never goes his way.  
Bokuto’s hands leave his and go straight to his waist, pushing their bodies closer. Akaashi doesn’t know what to do with his hands so they just hover over Bokuto’s broad shoulders.  
It feels a little like the last time they danced like this, bodies pressed together, their breaths mingling. Last time though they had a lot more bodies around them, the music was louder and shittier, Bokuto has accidently kicked his shin.

“You know what i don’t miss, Though? Math. Uuuugh I was so terrible at it.” Bokuto doesn’t miss a beat, he is smiling and laughing as if he couldn’t feel Akaashis heartbeat against his own. He knows he can because all Akaashi can focus on is the bump bump bump of Bokuto’s. “But you were always there to help me so i guess i can’t complain, really.” 

_You were always there for me.  
You were always there._

_“ It's funny how they're all the same  
It's funny how you always remember  
And we've both done it all a hundred times before”  
_  
“Oh I talked to Kenma one of those days, you're working on a big project, right.” 

Akaashi let’s his hands drop on each side of Bokuto’s shoulders. His back looks bigger than it did when they were in school. All of his looks bigger. (He thinks about the freckles all over his back and he imagines if there are more to that collection)

“Yes, Tenma-san needed help with it and I offered.”  
Bokuto doesn’t even blink .  
“Don’t overwork yourself ‘kaashi.”  
“I won’t.” 

When did lying to Bokuto become so easy?

The song chorus starts and Bokuto sways them a little bit harder so Akaashi has to really hold onto him to be able to follow. 

“You never mentioned it. Being an editor. You never said anything about it.” Bokuto grows, his lip is doing a funny thing, as if he is trying not to pount. Akaashi laughs.

“You never asked.” 

_“And the ground has been slowly pulling us back down”_

“I shouldn’t have to! I’m your best friend.” Bokuto is now full on pouting. It doesn’t match his face, makes him look like a man-child. Akaashi is foolishly smiling now. 

He knows that Bokuto being in one of his moods is something people don’t quite get, that most times are inconvenient. But Akaashi loves it. It is proof that maybe Bokuto hasn’t changed at all.

“You are?” He is teasing, Bokuto knows it too because he is smiling. The song picks up a bit and Bokuto makes them spin, Akaashi trips a little bit making Bokuto’s hand hold his waist tighter.  
Akaashi was wrong, this is completely different from the last time they danced. Before they didn’t have anything to worry about, the future was not something they had to even think about. Now Bokuto holds him tight as if he is scared Akaashi will disappear as soon as he lets go. To be honest, he might as well do it. 

“Of course! It’s not because we are not talking that it means you're not my best friend!” 

The way he says it, smiling and oh so happy to just be around him breaks his heart. 

_“It would be a hundred times easier  
If we were young again”_

“Why aren’t we talking anymore?” He is genuinely asking. He is just curious and he knows if Akaashi asked he would just drop it.

 _Because I'm scared._ Is the first thing he thinks. It’s what he always tells Kenma, and his mom when she picks up.  
_Because I'm a coward_. He was a coward before, he is still one now.  
_Because i love you._  
Most nights, when he is almost asleep, he likes to picture what his life would be if he had made different choices.  
Maybe he would be working as a lawyer like his mom wanted.  
Maybe he would have a bigger apartment, or even a house where he would invite Kuroo and Kenma and all his friends to hang out.  
Maybe things would be exactly like they are now but he would come home to _him._  
Maybe he would still kind of hate his job but he would have him to complain.  
Maybe he would barely see his friends but when he did he would have someone to hold his hand underneath the table.

_I’m a coward because I love you so much that I'm scared that if you asked, I would change everything._

“I don’t know.” he says instead, he is not lying, completely.  
"It 's okay. Sometimes it is good not to know.’ 

Akaashi half expects Bokuto to be mad at him, or to just be sad. To make him talk about it and put him into the spotlight until Akaashi loses it and confesses.  
It would be so much easier if they were young again without time chasing them down.

“You know, for a while I thought it was something I did.” Bokuto says, his voice is lower and his eyes are downcast but he never takes his hands off him. “Thought that maybe you had finally had enough of me.”  
“Bokuto, how could I ever be tired of you?” He doesn't even think about it.  
“I don’t know. People change. You’ve changed!” 

_You have changed_

Akaashi Keiji hates change.  
He knew it was inevitable, that it was just how life was and that he had no control over it. But still, if he could, he would keep things the same.  
But here, in Bokuto’s arms, in their old school gymnasion in a 10 year class reunion he wasn’t even part of, he thinks that he is so glad things changed. 

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to offend you or anything…”  
“Hey Bokuto” He interrupts the older boy. “Do you ever wish things were different that night?” 

For the first time ever since that song began, Bokuto separated their bodies. It’s funny, Akaashi thinks, he hadn’t seen Bokuto for almost 10 years but his body misses him more now that he had just held him than it did the first time they parted.

“Keiji, what?”  
“That night, the last time we danced, do you wish things had ended differently?” 

He doesn’t know the answer he is expecting, he knows the answer he wants, the one that, funnily enough, would change everything. 

“Sometimes, yes.” Bokuto says, he doesn’t leave time for Akaashi to be disappointed for the ‘sometimes’. “But I know why you did it. I do wonder how things could be, how we could be if things were different, but I'm happy with how life is going now.”

 _“But as it is  
And it is” _  
“You know, Keiji, I have missed you the second you left.”

_“We're just two slow dancers, last ones out”_

Akaashi had spent years thinking about kissing Bokuto Koutaro in front of all their friends in a school gymnasium in a party he was completely overdressed for. 17 year old Akaashi didn’t get his kiss, instead he ran away as soon as the night was over.  
10 years later, same school gymnasium, a different party he was still too overdressed to, half of his friends had already left; Akaashi is so glad he doesn’t have to wonder anymore.

Akaashi is walking home, his coat is too big for him (because it's not his), his breath comes out in clouds from the cold.  
On his phone there is a message asking from Kenma confirming their “coffee date.” and one from Bokuto asking if he had arrived home safe (it’s the third time he asks the same thing and Akaashi has to answer that no, he hasn't arrived yet.). 

He can't stop smiling ever since they parted in the school parking lot. (It was not a goodbye, Bokuto had promised, it will never be a goodbye.) 

He keeps humming this song, their song he decries, thinking about how much his life had changed in 3 hours and how glad he is that it did.

_“To think that we could stay the same”_

He sings as he makes his way home.

**Author's Note:**

> Since the very first time I heard this song I knew I had to do something related to Bokuaka and so Two Slow Dancers- The Fic was born!  
> Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing! 
> 
> Also special thanks to Ari and The Cheer Squad group for beta reading it, love you ladies <3.
> 
> Find me on [Twitter](mooncatyoongi)


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